Predictably perhaps, I burned out.
 Because ‘helping’ as a leader was actually people pleasing at my own expense - and that spilled over into my life. Boundaries? What were they? 
I tried so many modalities to try and get ‘fixed’ - medications, Consultants, CBT therapy, mindfulness, yoga, massage, physiotherapy, acupuncture, homoeopathy, it goes on. 

And then I fell over..... 

I had great feedback, and promotions, but….I ‘just needed to be more confident’, ‘grow a thicker skin’, ‘be more assertive’
 Unhelpfully, the self-doubt and imposter syndrome firmly set in.
So I worked harder to be a ‘better’ leader and technical expert, did more leadership courses, a second degree with distinction. 
And self-help books on leadership, assertiveness, perfectionism.
But I still felt like a fraud, that I’d be found out as lacking, that I wasn’t a natural leader - others seemed so very sure of themselves.
In fact it just got worse. So I tried harder. Tried to please everyone.
My mental and physical health suffered, I was exhausted, migraines uncontrollable. 

But I still wasn't fixed...

Until I started to remember who I was…
After my first burnout, I began to explore and understand my nature as an introvert. A well-timed leadership course pointed out the strengths of my MBTI INFJ nature. A friend pointed out my ‘highly sensitive’ traits. As I learned to coach formally I realised I was highly empathic. 

It all changed in tiny steps…

Managing my energy, nervous system and supporting myself as an introvert, highly sensitive person and empath was the key. Being coached enabled me to positively building towards a future, rather than simply moving away from what I didn’t want. Establishing my values, goals, what lights me up, what drains me, was critical. 

I had finally realised what the balance was, the key to my own version of success - leading as a woman, an introvert, a highly sensitive person, as an empath, and according to my values - in short as me. 

​It required courage and I needed that coaching support to start forming boundaries in the extrovert, less sensitive, less empathic ‘norm’ in corporate. Saying no, not yes. Even the simplest practical stuff I met with internal resistance - taking breaks through the working day, refusing meetings in my lunch hour. 

And then I started to wonder, if I struggled with imposter syndrome and people pleasing for so long, how many other quieter leaders are out there doing the same? Without the right support? Without knowing how to give themselves permission to lead AS themselves?

My passion and mission now is to help Quieter Leaders to create the success that they want and deserve in their leadership, career, and life - because of who they are, not despite it.